Humor from on High

Thursday, January 05, 2006

God 41, USC 38

Thought I'd talk some college football with God. Unfortunately, he was rather evasive...

Me: Hey God.
God: Hello child. What's your name?
Me: Joshua
God: How are you doing, Joshua.
Me: Fine, thank you.
God: What's your favorite movie?
Me: Contact.
God: I've never seen it. Is that a good movie for children?
Me: Not really.
God: Are you serious? For real.
Me: Yep.
God: Are we still talking about ?
Me: I'm not sure what we're talking about.
God: Could you ever be certain? I believe we were talking about Yep.
Me: Sure, whatever. Hey, I have a question.
God: Gee. Are you saying you don't care about it? You've got my full attention. Ask me anything.
Me: Were you really supporting Texas last night?
God: I was.
Me: You seem like more of a USC fan.
God: Interesting comparison, and probably true.
Me: I mean, the burnt orange just doesn't say God to me.
God: What is that?
Me: The University of Texas' school color.
God: Do you like your school?
Me: I'm going to ignore that.
God: Would you recommend this action to a friend?
Me: Ignoring God? Probably not.
God: Do you still ? Why the uncertain tone?
Me: You're very wrathful.
God: You think I am wrathful.
Me: At least, you were in the old testament.
God: I was?
Me: Sure.
God: OK let's do it. When?
Me: Be wrathful?
God: OK I will try to be wrathful.
Me: NO!
God: Are you serious?
Me: Yes!
God: I can't believe it.
Me: Don't take it out on me, please.
God: Your polite style is very nice. I never take it out on you.
Me: Thank you, thank you, thank you.
God: you are quite welcome.
Me: Okay gotta run...
God: Yeah okay, Why do you have to do it?
Me: Have to get back to work.
God: OK, don't let your boss catch you talking to me.
Me: Right. He's a Buddhist.
God: I am glad we agree. I don't know very many Buddhist.
Me: I wouldn't think so.
God: No one says you have to.
Me: True. Bye!
God: You and I are on the same wavelength, Joshua. Bye for now.

Good talk God.


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